Monday, December 27, 2010

Two out of three ain't bad.

I saw 3 new movies: Revenge of the Dead Girls, Bad Biology and Sick Nurses. I then realized I have a habit of watching movies that I know will be highly disturbing or gross (or both). So, I'm not going to fight it anymore: I love weird movies, and I'm not going to deny that fact anymore. And boy, did I find some winners last night and this morning. Revenge of the Dead Girls stars...okay I have no frackin clue who those people were. It's some French horror movie that came out in the 80s. From what I understood, radioactive goo was placed into a milk supply, and the three girls that drank it dies and came back as really pissed off zombies. All I know is it had A LOT of nudity and gore.

Just to give you an example, the main scientist contracts a form of necrosis in his hand. This passes on to his pregnant wife's stomach. We are then treated to a lovely scene where her stomach literally dissolves and we her insides and an unborn fetus. Changing subjects for a moment, I was very uncomfortable after seeing that. I do not like to see anything that involves pregnant women being injured to the point where you actually see a fetus. I love horror movies, but I still have my friggin limit. But I digress. This movie really didn't make a whole lot of sense, so I can't really recommend it for any reason.

Next up we have Bad Biology. And all I can say is holy crap, who the hell came up with this? More actors I've never heard of, but it was an interesting story. It's about a woman who was born with a freak genetic mutation that left her with seven clitorises and the ability to conceive and give birth in under two hours. She's also insane and has a nasty habit of killing her sexual partners as soon as they orgasm. Her equally screwed up match is Batz, a guy that has a monster penis with its own mind. I'll spare you anymore details. I will say that given the subject matter, it is a very well written movie. It was really funny once you get past the visuals. That being said, I don't even know who I would recommend this to or if I could recommend it...

Last we have Sick Nurses. It's an Asian horror movie, so it's bound to be all kinds of messed up. And it totally delivers. A doctor and six nurses make money off of harvesting dead bodies. Don't ask me why they do it or how they got started. It's never explained. I'm actually okay with that because it's not an important part of the story. The doctor cheats on his girlfriend/soon to be fiancee with one of the nurses and she gets pregnant. Well the girlfriend doesn't take it to well, and threatens to go to the police. So the doctor and nurses ban together and kill her. Unfortunately for them, she comes back and gets her revenge.

This is an interesting film because in most revenge movies, you feel sorry for the victim, but at least one of the attackers wants forgiveness and you want them to live. That's definitely not the case here. The pregnant nurse (who happens to be the sister of the murdered woman) actually tries to kill the ghost again by stabbing her, then burning her corpse. I don't know why, but it kind of pissed me off. First you betray your own blood by sleeping with the love of her life, get knocked up, kill your sister and then have the nerve to kill her again? I call shenanigans. But like I said, she gets her possessing her pregnant sisters body and forcing her to give birth to her again. The problem is she wasn't always a she. That's right folks! Our murder victim was actually a man that had a sex change so the doctor would marry him/her. I didn't say it made sense, I just said it was a good movie. While I liked it, I just don't have the heart to recommend it unless you're a hardcore horror fanatic.

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